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Dec. 19, 2020 8:49 p.m.
It’s not easy being strong all the time. My grandpa once said, “I never had to worry about you—you always pulled yourself up by your boot straps.” And I really didn’t know how to respond because there is so much he doesn’t know. How much I went through alone. And it was through sheer luck, determination and a few good friends that got me through the bad times. That saved me when I was so close to being lost.
I feel lost right now but I know I’m not. I will persevere, as I always have, tears and all. Tears I will never shed in front of you.
The other one once asked me, cruelly, high on heroin, “What—are you gonna cry?”
And you know what? Yes—I did and am. But you know who’s alive? ME.