empty

i feel so.. empty.

i don't know what's wrong with me. it's like there's something in my life that's missing..and it has been for a while. so i've noticed myself trying to change things in my life..to get it back..or something equivalent. all to no avail, obviously.

sighs.

i'm getting tired of getting no where.

everyday, the same thing.

maybe different places, situations, or people..but in the end it's always the same.

and then..it's like people want something from me and i can't give it to them..and i don't know why.

what is wrong with me??

i think something is holding me back. i just don't know what it is. i need to figure out what it is, though, before i lose everything..

maybe i already have.

maybe i never had it in the first place.

or maybe it doesn't matter.

each time i reach for something i can't reach it. it's like something is within sight but not within arm's reach.

it's just..there. and i'm just looking at it. knowing it's something i will never have.

god, i should write a book or something about all this crap..

this stuff just kills me inside.

everyday, every hour, every waking moment.

all these questions i have no answers to.

maybe it's suppose to be this way..maybe i need to stop analyzing everything and thinking upon every little emotion i feel and just let it be.

just let it be.